The Invisible Women: The Anguish of Widow Isolation

In many parts of Asia, widows face immense hardship and suffering after the death of their husbands. One of the most heartbreaking aspects is how they are shunned, ostracized and blamed by their communities. This social widow isolation leaves these “invisible women” emotionally devastated and utterly alone in their grief.[1]

Ancient Superstitions Lead to Rejection

Ancient superstitions persist in some Asian cultures that view widows as cursed or ill-fated. There is a prevailing belief that they must have committed sins in a past life that caused their husband’s death. As a result, people fear that even passing by a widow on the street could bring them bad luck. This makes widows outcasts in their own villages.[2]

Gulika faced such prejudice after her husband Manan died in an accident. Suddenly the people in her village turned their backs on her, believing she was cursed. The sorrow of losing her husband was compounded by the painful rejection from those around her. Like Gulika, many widows’ financial hardship, the severe ostracism they face, leaves these women helpless and emotionally distraught.[3]

Blamed for Their Husband’s Death

Another common superstition is that widows caused their husband’s death through their own misdeeds. Widows are often blamed for their spouse’s death, regardless of the actual circumstances.

For example, a Nigerian widow’s husband lay sick in the hospital when her sister-in-law wrongly accused her of causing his impending death by her actions. The widow was blamed for something completely out of her control. This pattern of scapegoating adds to widows’ anguish.[4]

Abandoned by Family

After their husbands die, widows frequently face neglect and humiliation from family members who shun them. The Kenyan widow Grace Njeri Mwichigi suffered stress, confusion and fear in the months after her husband’s death in tribal violence. Much of the neglect came from her own relatives.[5]

When Gulika’s husband died, even her in-laws rejected her on the grounds she was cursed. She was left completely on her own, without any family support in her time of tremendous grief. Sadly, many widows experience abandonment by the very people who should comfort them.[6]

Seen as a Bad Omen

Another way widows are shunned is through the perception they are a bad omen. For instance, a widow named Damini in South Asia was rejected by her nephews after her husband died. They refused to give her food and drove her out, forcing her to beg from strangers to survive.[7]

People would not even approach Damini when she fell severely ill, because she was seen as cursed. Widows like Damini are cruelly left to fend for themselves due to these destructive beliefs. Their very presence is seen as ill-fated.

Emotional Toll of Isolation

The immense emotional pain of this isolation and rejection cannot be overstated. Widows become “invisible” people, neglected by society. After losing their life partner, they long for care and comfort. Instead they are utterly abandoned.

Gulika fell into deep emotional despair after becoming an outcast in her village. The added burden of rejection made coping with her husband’s death tremendously difficult. She felt helpless and distraught.

Like Gulika, many widows spiral into severe depression and mental anguish. The lack of any community support causes profound psychological damage.

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